Let life be without unhappiness

Sudhirendar Sharma

Sudhirendar Sharma

There has never been as much unhappiness in human life as today. The fear of having less and desire of having more has contributed as much. To fret about something over which you have no control brings unnecessary distress upon yourself. Peering at the world today, it seems that there is turbulence ahead, because of tectonic shifts in economy and society which is leading to excesses of exploitation and indulgence. Wading through this maze may seem a way out, but unhappiness lingers all across and all along.

Reason to be happy

Happiness in itself is nothing but is an emotive feeling that is attributable. Yet, one would like to get such a feeling. It generates a sense of self-esteem, which in itself is an important source of human happiness. To see that others hold us in high esteem can be a source of contentment. No surprise, therefore, most human beings like to display their better selves to the world to seek happiness and contentment. Much of our life is spent in finding such an elusive process. But former World Bank Chief Economist Kaushik Basu thinks that reason, and logic, can guide humans to achieve happiness.

It seems that reasoning can only take us closer to finding out what makes us happy, but that too on the surface. The capacity to reason, says Basu, is not only the most underrated but valued too. That’s why a lot of human woes, social and economic, stems from the absence of reasoning. But reasoning seems to have its limits, as happiness is beyond the purview of reason and logic. The human ability to reason falters when humans have to apply logic to human emotions. In this interconnected world, more than reasoning it is the influence of togetherness that need to be factored in. Even if interconnection causes happiness, it will last till interconnection lasts. 

UN stuck

One would expect us to reason out of the root cause of unhappiness. In theory, it might seem possible but not in practice. It is beyond redemption when there is more than one reason for it or the reason itself is beyond repair. And we are not making any serious efforts as more than 50 percent of our time is spent in repeating our habit(s) Come to think about it, a remarkable number of habits get repeated every day and we are often proud of it. Ironically, most of us believe our habits lead us to take right and happy decisions. 

Drawing on her expertise as a clinical psychologist with a masters in neuroscience, Dr Sophie Mort concludes that in nine out of ten cases our habits do us good only in few cases. Who wants to follow sheep, but the system is so programmed that each one ends up following the flock? Around 2.8 billion people on Facebook, 2.3 billion on You Tube, and an estimated 1.8 billion on Instagram, whether qualified or not, share their views on living a happy life. Whether or not they are happy remains an open question!

Good Habits, Bad Habits

Happiness has turned out to be a big industry. Not only have there been the Ministries opened to address the crucial issue of happiness, but happiness clinics have also opened up and happiness therapies too are doing a good business. Yet, happiness remains as elusive. ‘Get married; the research says it will make you happier’; ‘Ignore marriage, it’s likely to end in divorce’; ‘Buy a house and get on the housing ladder;’ ‘Live in a van, don’t do what society wants you to do;’ ‘You are enough as you are.’ Messages like this help avoid having regrets, the idea is to live life true to oneself. The oral therapies of the kind ease one out of status quo, though temporarily. 

A huge part our lives flows through our habit selves, says Prof. Wendy Wood. This is that part of us, which is powerful, which is reliable, and which is always there. We are stuck to our habits, quite often there is hardly any time to reason out of it. We all live habitually already, without being seriously aware of it. And because of that, a big part of who are you and why we do what we do is often ignored or is taken for granted. The many ways things could be done better get missed out. Samuel Johnson had rightly remarked: ‘The diminutive chain of habits are seldom enough to be felt, till they are too strong to be broken’.

The challenge is to avoid search for happiness, but to get rid of unhappiness. Let life be without unhappiness, remarked the Buddha.                                       

Reason to be Happy

by Kaushik Basu

Penguin RandomHouse, London

Extent: 214, Price: Rs. 500.

(Un)Stuck

by Sophie Mort

Simon&Schuster, New Delhi

Extent: 274, Price: Rs. 699.

Good Habits, Bad Habits

by Wendy Wood

Macmillan, London

Extent: 308; Price: Rs. 425. 

(Dr. Sudhirendar Sharma is a writer and researcher specializing in development issues. He is based in New Delhi, India.)

First published as Bibliography in The Hindu on March 20, 2025.